{"product_id":"ho-ho-homicidal-maniac-paperback","title":"Ho Ho Homicidal Maniac - Paperback","description":"\u003cdiv\u003e\u003cp style=\"text-align: right;\"\u003e\u003ca href=\"https:\/\/reportcopyrightinfringement.com\/\" target=\"_blank\" rel=\"nofollow\"\u003e\u003cb\u003eReport copyright infringement\u003c\/b\u003e\u003c\/a\u003e\u003c\/p\u003e\u003c\/div\u003e\u003cp\u003eby \u003cb\u003eK. a. Merikan\u003c\/b\u003e (Author)\u003c\/p\u003e\u003cp\u003e\u003cstrong\u003e\u003cem\u003e\"I love Christmas. So every year, I kill someone. As a treat.\"\u003c\/em\u003e\u003c\/strong\u003e\u003c\/p\u003e\u003cp\u003e\u003c\/p\u003e\u003cp\u003e\u003cstrong\u003eNico\u003c\/strong\u003e\u003c\/p\u003e\u003cp\u003eHave you ever fallen in love with a man as he was pointing his gun at you? Well, I have. Tiny problem? I'm in the middle of my murderous Christmas tradition, and he's a witness.\u003c\/p\u003e\u003cp\u003eBut it's not his fault I got too excited and didn't check if I was alone. I can't just kill him because of my own blunder. Not when he has such dreamy green eyes filled with fear and pent-up rage.\u003c\/p\u003e\u003cp\u003e\u003c\/p\u003e\u003cp\u003eWhat I can do is take him with me for safekeeping while I work out how to make him understand that while my methods are cruel, my intentions are pure.\u003c\/p\u003e\u003cp\u003eOr how to make him fall for me.\u003c\/p\u003e\u003cp\u003eWhichever is first.\u003c\/p\u003e\u003cp\u003e\u003c\/p\u003e\u003cp\u003e\u003cstrong\u003eBlake\u003c\/strong\u003e\u003c\/p\u003e\u003cp\u003eMy eighteenth birthday was supposed to be the happiest day of my sheltered life. Finally, I would gain independence and inherit half my family fortune. Instead, I ended up kidnapped.\u003c\/p\u003e\u003cp\u003e\u003c\/p\u003e\u003cp\u003eI was about to get carved into pieces when... a Christmas miracle in the form of a beefy homicidal maniac saved me.\u003c\/p\u003e\u003cp\u003e\u003c\/p\u003e\u003cp\u003eOnly now I'm trapped in his basement and getting love bombed by a psycho golden retriever. He eats turkey sandwiches for every breakfast, enjoys making festive ornaments out of human teeth, and lets his violent urges shine like a Christmas tree.\u003c\/p\u003e\u003cp\u003e\u003c\/p\u003e\u003cp\u003eI shouldn't find him hot.\u003c\/p\u003e\u003cp\u003eI shouldn't want to indulge his murderous tendencies.\u003c\/p\u003e\u003cp\u003eAnd I definitely shouldn't want him to be my first.\u003c\/p\u003e\u003cp\u003eBut I'm being hunted and might just need a monster to keep me safe.\u003c\/p\u003e\u003cp\u003e\u003c\/p\u003e\u003cp\u003e(And he does actually make really good fruitcake)\u003c\/p\u003e\u003cp\u003e\u003c\/p\u003e\u003cp\u003e\u003c\/p\u003e\u003cp\u003e\u003c\/p\u003e\n            \u003cdiv\u003e\n\u003cstrong\u003eNumber of Pages:\u003c\/strong\u003e 302\u003c\/div\u003e\n            \u003cdiv\u003e\n\u003cstrong\u003eDimensions:\u003c\/strong\u003e 0.68 x 8 x 5 IN\u003c\/div\u003e\n            \u003cdiv\u003e\n\u003cstrong\u003ePublication Date:\u003c\/strong\u003e October 23, 2025\u003c\/div\u003e\n            ","brand":"BooksCloud","offers":[{"title":"Default Title","offer_id":47268201693433,"sku":"9781914921926","price":21.58,"currency_code":"USD","in_stock":true}],"thumbnail_url":"\/\/cdn.shopify.com\/s\/files\/1\/0789\/2782\/3097\/files\/qZV9-uqnVV9781914921926.webp?v=1768880033","url":"https:\/\/bookscloud.io\/products\/ho-ho-homicidal-maniac-paperback","provider":"BooksCloud Book Dropshipping","version":"1.0","type":"link"}